Watching the strong get weaker one day at a time!


This is turning into the hardest thing I have ever had to do. My sweet hubby is the strongest person I know on this earth and watching him grow weaker and weaker is killing me. My heart breaks a little more everyday.

I go through the scenarios about this illness and they do not help. Yes he can improve. I am well awarebof that! I just do not enjoy watching him feel so bad.

He is so weak, he can’t walk to the bathroom without getting short of breath. His legs and abdomen are so swollen you can hardly recognize him. He says he doesn’t hurt, but is just uncomfortable.

I have no doubt he is saved and going to heaven. That is not what my tears are for. My tears come from watching what this disease is doing to his body. I know the Good Lord has a plan and is watching over my sweeatheart. He is by my side as I take care of Barry.

If this procedure is what Bear needs to make him better, I pray that his kidney levels have improved and they can schefule it as soon as possible. If not, please give Bear the strength to accept the fact that they have to go into his chest s third time. He is scared and I cannot bkame him. The doctors have repeatedly told him all about the risk. It scares him to hear about it. It scares me too.

I feel like Barry is taking me through a trip down memory lane. We spent the weekend in his hometown. We took a million pictures of special places where he spent his childhood.  Is he trying to tell me something?

12 thoughts on “Watching the strong get weaker one day at a time!

  1. I am also keeping you and Barry lifted up to God in prayer. At times when I feel helpless when I see a friend hurting I know that prayer is the best gift I offer to both of you – special hugs from PA to you and Barry.

    • Hugs back at you from the deep south of Ga. Thank you, Patty….I know it is in God’s hands, but I’m scared! I keep praying for strength and guidance. I try my best to stay strong in front of him! It just breaks my heart seeing him in pain. Thanks again, Jill

  2. Sending positive thoughts to you and your family. I am so sorry you are going through this.

  3. Oh, Jill, my heart breaks for you both to go through this. Thank you for letting us know how things are for you right now. I admire your strength and your faith so much. xo

    • It is so hard, Luanne! I can’t truly describe the feeling. The comfort I have is I knowing I will see him again one day! I’m talking like he’s dying. He’s just very sick. The surgery he needs will be dangerous. I’m scared….but content. I can’t think of life without him. Thank you for your kind words.xo

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