Dreadful Doctors

My title is not fair to all doctor’s. I enjoy the physicians I am currently working with. The dread I am referring to is what they are going to tell me or ask me to do.  Since 2012, the neurologist I see thinks he needs to change the medications I am taking, just to see if something new will help.

What I have discovered and verbalize to them is “NOTHING HELPS”.  I feel like a lab rat at times. Actually had one physician say I should feel honored to be in his presence because is that good! Needless to say, I refuse to ever see him again.

I have enjoyed working with the rehab center and the cancer specialist. They try to cover every aspect of care a patient may need. They offer incredible services at Winship.

After everything, we have been through, it is wonderful to be treated special after certain diagnoses. The sad part is the numbers of people in and out of the doctors offices at Winship.

One of the things that I dread yearly, is my thyroid scan. It is such a long process and it takes all week just to get to the point where the scan can be done. For some reason, My Protein levels are staying elevated and thyroid cancer is playing hide and seek in my throat. The last PET Scan showed there is still something in my neck. Hopefully, this will be the last treatment for a few years. This is only the fifth time since 2009.

Personally, I am ready to run away from home. I put a smile on my face and keep going. I refuse to let this or anyone get me down. I need to take care of myself, Barry, Maggie and mom.  I am faithful the the Good Lord will be by my side through the next week. It has been a bad couple of weeks and it is time to turn things around. Have a joyful week everyone!

Ode to my Lost Hormones

A breast cancer diagnosis, brought questions flooding in,

After the process was explained, one tiny question remained,

scores of specialist could not answer, I was scared silly of what was to come.

 

They called me “Lucky”, to have the tumor caught so early,

The treatments that followed were easy to get through,

Thanks to my cousin, Cindy, for sharing her secrets of survival,

What could have been unbearable, became tolerable,

Thanks for the info cuz, it was much appreciated.

 

Once the lumpectomy was over and the chemo began,

I found myself awestruck of the millions that have gone before me!

all  of the fight, strength, love and passion that has gone before me,

I persevere to continue the fight!

 

Thank you, Ladies for the inspiration to keep going.

I am a survivor, I refused to let this bring me down.

My chemo was coming to an end and I knew radiation was the next step,

 

Little did I know my journey was just beginning.

My sweetheart became seriously ill and needed immediate surgery to survive,

The same night my father went home to be with the Lord. As Barry slept, I told him to be strong,

I knew he was a survivor, Several family members and our Pastor helped me through the hard parts.

 

Life started to calm and a routine began, while Barry was being cared for at the hospital,

I left daily for my radiation treatments and returned just before supper.

Our Jeep had to be on auto-pilot to get me, from the hospital and back daily.

 

Once the oncologist suggested we turn my ovaries off,

first thing I pictured was a little switch that needed to be turned on each ovary, she had other things

in mind, once I knew my options,

 

I took the injection until I could schedule the surgery needed,

I knew the minute I woke from surgery, that my Doctor had been successful.

My first official hot flash was in the recovery room! 

 

The Estrogen and other things produced by my ovaries are now gone, the surgeon had a wee surprise for me,

Soy can mimic Estrogen in the body, soooooooooo…..no over the counter remedies for me!

Now the brown spots, the “hot and cold” flashes and mood swings were just around the corner,

On March 28, 2014, I was thrown face first into MENOPAUSE!

 

Pumphead

In August 2013, my sweet husband passed out cold in our living room. In the process of falling, he struck his head on our front door and appeared to be having a seizure. Later we discovered the seizure-like activity was due to hitting his head. He had a concussion. The Cat scan showed he had swelling in the right lobe of the cerebrum. While I made sure he was safe, I got mom to call 911. The ambulance arrived and swept my sweetheart of to the hospital. We spent the next five months in and out of the hospital. Six months later, he is home, healthy and running circles around me. God is good! Numerous doctors tried to tell me that Barry would not survive. They did not know my hubby. Barry and I are strong-willed people and we do not give up easily. I was not about to let him give up! Once we settled into a routine,  I started to notice subtle differences in my sweety. At first, it put it off to what he had been. I then realized his body was full of medications floating around his body. He needed to flush his body with healthy food and fluids. His thought processes were slower. He lost his inhibitions. For the first few weeks, it was like I had married a seventeen year old boy trying to discover the world in 24 hours. It was hard to keep up with him. He is closer to normal now. When I had a chance to speak with his cardiologist,  he educated me on “pumphead”. The link below will go into more detail. I will miss the comical antics, but thrilled I am to have my Barry back. We spend our time in the kitchen discovering low-sodium dishes to keep us healthy. Mom lives with us. She needs the low – sodium dishes more than we do. http://www.heartdisease.about.com/cs/bypasssurgery/a/pumphead.htm

Hopefully, no one has forgotten about us!

Life has slowed to a point that I might get a post or two in. Barry gets home from the hospital and settled down, then Mom had a problem that required a hospital.She is home and feeling better. She is actually with one of my sisters for a few days. We hope everyone had a wonderful July 4th. We made it a Pajama day and accomplished nothing at all. My health is stable. I wasn’t happy with my last MRI, but God has a plan…I take one day at a time….Oooooooops, I forgot our Maggie. Our treasured family pet has joined the rest of our happy home, with health issues. Our sweet baby has developed an arrhythmia and possibly a brain tumor. The first week Barry was home, Maggie went into Congestive Heart Failure, due to the irregular heartbeat.  She has since suffered three seizures and has something making her right cheek protrude. It looks so bad, but she does not appear to be in pain…..Thank Goodness……..

One day at a time, that is the slogan in our home!

More tomorrow. My hands are getting tired. We need to get back in a routine of typing. My kitchen is calling….Have a great weekend all! God Bless!

 

 

True Love and Commitment

Is true love, commitment, and faith a thing of the past?  Does anyone today know the meaning of these simple words? I’m not sure they do! There are many definitions available for the words listed above. It is up to you to decide which one best suits your needs. Of course, my opinion is what it is, mine3.

I guess it could be in God’s plan that certain people remain alone;

but I am a true believer! You have to want someone to find them and be friendly with the words compromise, faith and trust! For a very long time, I ran when22 those words came into a conversation. After my first husband, words like those, brought the scaredy cat out in me.

 

As I sit at my husband’s bedside; not knowing what the next minute will bring; I feel sad for so many people. Today’s generation of kids, will never know or understand the feeling of loving someone so much you are willing to sit by their bedside hour after hour, just to be near them.  To know they are safe for the moment and realize your smile will be the first thing they see when they open their eyes. The smile that graces their lips, at that moment, makes it all worthwhile.

Every time I help him stand or gain his balance, brings us closer together. In 2009, Barry was there for me. Telling me the same things about recovery and helping with anything and everything I needed. Sitting at my bedside, unsure of the future. He could have walked away and he did not. He stuck by my side because he loves me. Experiences we have shared, have only brought us closer together.

This definitely was not part of our retirement plan, but we are making the most out of what time God has blessed us with. Presently, we maybe be part couch potato, but we have plans.

Accommodation is a big part of our plans. The health issues we are dealing with, require us to make changes to our original plans. Just by chance, my handsome hubby is handling change better. A trip to a beautiful, sandy beach needs to be researched for handicapped accessibility. As we make travel plans, we learn something new with every call.

We are back, at least for the moment!

In our earlier post, we stated we’d try to get a post in a week. Maybe more. According to how our day goes! Between radiation treatments, Barry’s doctors appointments and our energy levels; we are lucky to get anything posted. Have patience. I have taken pictures and written posts while sitting around the hospital. A lot of interesting things go on in local hospitals! Just wait……

Our August

  • My dad was on Hospice Care and not doing well. He had a nasty cold and with me on chemotherapy, I could not go see him. My immune system was too low.
  • The Eighth of August was the start of my nightmare month. While attempting to hook the computer to the television, Barry past out cold, hit his head on the front door and appeared to have a seizure.  I could not get 911 fast enough. He was admitted from the ER with an arrhythmia.
  • Two mornings later, I received a call from Barry letting me know they had moved him to ICU during the night and were now planning to transfer him to another hospital.  No hospital employee ever contacted me.
  • Once at the other hospital, he was admitted to their Cardiac Care Unit for close observation.
  • Within  2 days. he was having a pacemaker put in.
  • At my chemo treatment, it was discovered that I had a blood clot in axillary vein under my right arm. When I went in for my injection after chemo, the doctor felt I needed to go to the ER for evaluation. I was short of breath and had chest pain. At least I got to go to the ER at the hospital Barry was in. I was closer to him, although I couldn’t see him before or immediately after the pacemaker surgery. Our Pastor was the perfect substitute. He is such a gracious man.
  •  As it turned out, I had pneumonia, thank goodness the blood clot had not moved to my lungs.They wanted to admit me, but I wanted to be with Barry.
  • A fever, 103, kept me home for a few days
  • He was in bad shape and needed immediate heart surgery
  • I could not get there fast enough. I spent the night before with him.
  • I found out my dad passed away three hours before Barry’s surgery.
  • Our Pastor and an Associate stayed with me during his surgery.  They brought coffee and donuts.
  • I was driven home, after we saw Barry was stable, by my pastor that night. My fever had popped it’s ugly head up again.
  • Our Pastor and an Associate stayed with me during his surgery.  They brought coffee and donuts. It stayed with me for the next week.
  • Someone from the church, Jason W.  and our nephew, Derrek checked on Barry for me while I was out of commission. I was actually chewing on the front door wanting to get to the hospital.
  • Once my fever got out the door, I spent the next 4 days at the hospital and ended up being able to take my sweetheart home with me. 20 days after being admitted. I found out the surgery they did was a mercy surgery. Barry was close to death and almost died during the surgery.
  • I spent the weekend attending the funeral for my dad.
  • On the way home from the hospital, We stopped for gas. We have a diesel Jeep. The station we stopped at was making renovations and still had a diesel sticker on a now unleaded pump. Needless to say, I filled the Jeep with unleaded gas. We were stranded for 4 hours until a wrecker arrived. We arrived home at 11pm.

Is that enough to deal with or do you want more? This isn’t all. My poor pup was home taking care of mom and the house.

We would like to thank everyone that helped make it through this bad, bad month! We love you all!

Through the Grace of our Heavenly Father, we are both alive and kicking. Maybe a little grayer and a I know a lot tired. We are here! Thank you, Dear Lord!

I’m going on a blogation

For those faithful followers, please don’t give up on me. My life needs my full attention for the time being. Barry is recovering well,  physically and mentally,  but his recovery is my number one priority at the moment. I will do my best to keep at least one post a week going. Have a great fall. Hope to be writing faithfully again soon!

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers! God bless you all! Please email me anytime at

tworightsattemptingtomakealeft@gmail.com.

I love email.

Thanks! Jill B.