Hopefully, no one has forgotten about us!

Life has slowed to a point that I might get a post or two in. Barry gets home from the hospital and settled down, then Mom had a problem that required a hospital.She is home and feeling better. She is actually with one of my sisters for a few days. We hope everyone had a wonderful July 4th. We made it a Pajama day and accomplished nothing at all. My health is stable. I wasn’t happy with my last MRI, but God has a plan…I take one day at a time….Oooooooops, I forgot our Maggie. Our treasured family pet has joined the rest of our happy home, with health issues. Our sweet baby has developed an arrhythmia and possibly a brain tumor. The first week Barry was home, Maggie went into Congestive Heart Failure, due to the irregular heartbeat.  She has since suffered three seizures and has something making her right cheek protrude. It looks so bad, but she does not appear to be in pain…..Thank Goodness……..

One day at a time, that is the slogan in our home!

More tomorrow. My hands are getting tired. We need to get back in a routine of typing. My kitchen is calling….Have a great weekend all! God Bless!

 

 

I want to write, but I am at a loss of words!

God doesn’t give you things you can’t handle, the things He gives you make you stronger. I can handle a lot, but just not sure how much more I can take.

When does your cracking point kick in? Do we have a cracking point or are we made to take and take and take…more more…How do you judge when enough is enough?

Is it that when God sees you  overwhelmed, he releases the more more and gives you a break?  I am not going to lie, I could use a huge break, but I am not sure my sweet husband can handle a break. At least over the next few weeks. We have to get the house ready for him to come home.

For the next six weeks, he will be on IV antibiotics and then oral antibiotics the rest of his life. A physical therapist will work on his strength at home, but I am still terrified. His lungs are filling up with fluid again, even sleeping with a bi-pap machine on. He is off oxygen all together, but I’m scared.I want to be able to care for him properly at home.

I was the one that couldn’t tell he was sick. He started showing signs of not feeling well, but refused to admit something was wrong and would not go to the doctor. I feel guilty that I didn’t push, now his cardiologist can’t give me a good answer about how much time he has. I can tell he is stressing over it, but he won’t talk to me. I have him scheduled with his psychiatrist at the first of the month. Surely home will be our new location by then.

I ask that everyone help me pray for grace, strength and mercy. Maybe with enough Faith added to the list, Barry and I will survive. Forgive my ramblings today, I am still am emotional disaster.

Writing through cancer: For the Week of July 28, 2013: What Did You Notice?

I was unable to walk today, I’m not feeling my best, so I stayed close to home. We went to church this morning, but unable to attend tonight. I tell Barry to go without me, but he doesn’t like me home alone. I gave up and quit arguing.

Yesterday,  Barry and I walked the yard and updated our garden journal. I’ll use our stroll around the yard for this post. We started at the front porrch. We have a few Chinese Fringe Flowers that need pruning and a few new spouts have popped up, that need transplanting. A few weeds that need to be handled,  but nothing I cannot do.

My minature butterfly bush has come back out and is almost three feet tall already. I need to work on the decorative well pump by the porch. My butterfly garden is suffering from inattention. The hosta’s have come up beautifully and I have a few that need transplanting this fall. It may take us that long to get the garden back to glory to make room for them. A Sweet Gum Tree has taken root near the water spicket. That needs to go!

On the hill to the right of the house, we have planted two red maples and attempted to handle a bad wash area with monkey grass and lillies. They are filling in nicely. Might take a year or two for it to fill in.
To the left of the new trees, we planted a few Chinese Fringe Flower Shrubs to act as a barrier near the guidewire for the telephone pole. Looking good near the road.

At the drive, I have a combo of old-fashioned lillies, Stella D’odro lillies and knockout roses. We have tons of room to add to this area, I just need to figure out what to add. We recently moved the mailbox to the otherside of the drive. It needs sprucing up.

Down the rightside of the drive, is considered mom’s territory.  We have a couple of things there, we planted prior to mom’s arrival. There are three heavenly Gardenia Shrubs well-established. One blueberry bush is closeby for the local critters to enjoy.

Behind those a Pin Oak is coming in nicely. It is large enough to sit a chair under to enjoy a little shade.  The rest on that side is is mom’s territory. I need to feed her a friendly reminder that she needs to do some weeding.

Under our bedroom window, we discovered a few surprises. Four O’clocks planted a few years ago have come back out and a lantana has popped up thanks to some sweet bird in the yard. It will transplant nicely when the time comes. The Hosta’s have come back out. They are huge and need a new home.

Beside the garage door the Smilix vine and lantana are gorgeous. The ramp and porch are around four feet tall. The lantana has out grown the porch already. The back of the house is more natural. We have two Corkscrew Willow Trees, a beauty berry bush, and one lone Pampas Grass. We need to do more in the back. I’d like to get a few hardscaping projects done. Barry and I will work slowly on those.

There is evidence of unknown wildlife either living or traveling through the yard. We watched a bunny run around for a few minutes. By the driveway, we saw a couple of lizards and salamanders playing aound on the porch. Barry got a wildlife camera for a retirement. We have been attempting to get pictures of what happens in the yard at night. No success yet!

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                                 Gardenias

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                                  Hostas

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                                       Gerber Daisy

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                                   Maggie and Mom’s Iris’s

Peace and Quiet

As I sit here,  totally alone (with the exception of the dog and fish), a strange feeling comes over my body. I’m not sure I recognize it. I have the remote control to myself,  no one is fighting for my chair, my blanket is mine, a pillow comfy under my neck, I think I have forgotten what this is called.

Could this strange sensation be relaxation? I haven’t relaxed in such a long time, it feels odd. I am actually getting sleepy. Maggie is already asleep in Barry’s chair. Shotgun is swimming  happily around in his clean tank. The sun is shining in the windows making everything nice snd cozy. I think I might take a nap.

I love my husband. He was a sweetheart to take mom to the Surgery Center for her eye surgery. While I have a few peaceful hours to myself, he has to sit and wait. I’m getting a sore throat and not feeling well, my orders are to rest. So, ladies and gentlemen, enjoy your day! I am off to sleepytown. Sweet Dreams, all!

One of those days!

Ever have a day you’d like to hide from? Crawl back in bed to sleep the day away? Or just crawl under the bed to hide from the world? Well, my day started off with a thump. That thump was me hitting the floor, face first, when I tried to turn over in the living room chair I had fallen asleep in and BAM! Flat on my face in the floor.

That was 5am. Three hours later, with Barry’s assistance, I almost tumbled backwards getting out of the tub. Barry managed to get the situation under control before we both took a second bath.

After getting ready, I had an appointment this morning, along with Barry and Mom. Luckily, mom and I were headed in the same direction. Barry had to head to Northside. Barry attended the first appointment with me.

On the way back to the truck, I went down hard on my right side, after tripping on the handicap ramp that needs attention. I skinned my right elbow, took the skin off the little toe on my left foot and bruised my ribs on the right back, from landing hard on the curb.

I think when mom is finished at the eye doctor, I’m going home and back to bed. Someone is trying to tell me to rest today. Hope everyone is having a better day than I am. If someone sees that truck that ran over me this morning, get the tag number please!

Writing through cancer: For the Week of June 30, 2013: Rediscovering Summer’s Joys

Through our health crisis’ s, Barry and I did not think  a lot about what we were losing, we focused on changing our behaviors,  unknowingly bringing a few Summer’s Joys back into our lives.

Gone are the days of lying on the couch, doing nothing to benefit ourselves. We have a plan for each day of the week. When our schedule is not saturated with appointments, we find an activity and get involved. We have found a local farmer’s market that carries items from around the world. We are enjoying experimenting with our new discoveries. There are several fruits from around the world, that might loook a little strange, but are quite tasty.

We walk, we work out, we have found a therapy pool to try out this summer, we garden, we feed the birds in the yard and plant things especially for the wildlife around. We hope to catch a few photos of them nibbling on the goodies we have provided.

We have a few special projects planned for the yard,  but will have to wait on chemo, radiation and the good southern sun to cool off before we can get started. The Georgia heat and humidity has to die down to be productive outside. It will drain you in a flat second if you aren’t careful. I think getting the cast off will help a lot.

Dad has been really sick this summer. The doctor has actually not given him long to live. He is being discharged home on Hospice care. Been busy trying to help as much as possible.  Poor Kristie is worn out. I wish we could help more. We are being as supportive as possible.

We have planted a few Japanese Maple Trees, that are looking incredible. I love watching what we plant grow. I can’t wait to work on our butterfly garden. I love watching the flutterflies and hummingbirds go wild on the blossoms.

With chemo and radiation, our summer joy’s will be early fall joys this year, but hey….we have something to look forward to.