UPDATE…UPDATE…UPDATE…UPDATE…UPDATE…UPDATE…

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It is with since pleasure that I post the facts I received today at my doctor’s visit. They caught my breast cancer early, Stage 1 Invasive (Hormonal) Ductal Carcinoma. It is definitely cancer, but it was caught early enough to not be a big deal to deal with. I’m having surgery on the 30th to remove the lump. Once the lump is out, she can tell me what type of treatment I need.  I told myself, I wouldn’t spend the weekend worrying myself sick about the diagnosis, but I apparently did subconsciously. When we arrived home after the appointment, I slept for six straight hours. Me thinks I was stressing a little more than I realized.

Personal Prayer Request

I’ve known this possibility exist for some time, but I was busy being positive this wouldn’t happen that it snuck up on me.

I found out I have breast cancer this morning. I can’t decide how I feel at the moment other than a little mad. I haven’t been able to do more than shed a tear or two, but when I feel the crying coming on, I’ll lock myself in my bedroom and let it fly.

The past few years, dealing with Cowden’s Syndrome and all the health issues it entails, I’ve felt like there is no way I can get cancer. Now I have to change my attitude to there is no way this cancer is going to get me! I’m actually angry. I guess that is where my fighting spirit comes from.

I’m worried about Barry and the stress he is putting himself through.This could have waited another year. He’d at least be two weeks post-stroke. I’m trying to be strong in front of him. He doesn’t need the worry. But I need him too!

Well, I need to write my usual weekend posts, so I’ll stop babbling.

If you are a praying person, please add me to your list. I need as many prayers as I can get. Thanks for your support!

I Wanna Run Away!

Please, someone tell me when it is okay to run away. I’m not sure how much more I can take before I crack. 

I live the “Life of Riley“. Honestly, I not sure what that means. Was it a TV show? Radio show? Cartoon? I’m going to look it up. The situations I’ve heard it used in usually involved someone having it made; not in need of anything; someone spoiled rotten. All of the above, at times, can describe my life.

I live in a beautiful home with the perfect husband and family pets. We have one boxer and one fish. One step-son that keeps his distance.

My husband and I are raising my mother. It can be a challenge at times. But we make it.

We are far from well off or rich, but we are comfy. A lot of people today can’t say that. It really hurts Barry and I to see others struggle. We help when we can, but keeping up with medical bills will eat you alive. 

Since 2009, Barry and I have run from doctor to doctor trying to figure my illness out. It is starting to feel like a waste of time. Every time I see a physician, something else is wrong.

Is this a never-ending battle? Is all the running around doing a bit of good? I guess I’m a little tired of being sick. I feel like my life is falling apart and I’m not sure what to do.

That doctor, last week, really threw me for a loop. Just uttering those 2 little words has my head in the toilet.

It was like the day the doctor told me about the brain tumor. “Oh by the way, you have a brain tumor.” That is how he told me. He added a few other things to it, but that was enough to shatter my world. My head was in a spin then, and it is spinning like a top now.

I’m not going to do anything stupid. God has kept me around for s reason. I have too much life left to live to do anything stupid, I’m just trying to write this down to see if it will shake me out of this funk.

I should be sleeping . Big birthday party tomorrow. Going to be a long day, I need my rest. Barry is snoring in the chair next to me as I type. Maggie is snoring on the couch. Maybe I should follow suit and go to sleep. Maybe I’ll feel better in the morning. 

Hope everyone has a good weekend. I’m trying to turn mine around. Be sweet!

Our 200th post, There is a link to the page, but I also put the post below to avoid confusion

 Click the link for our 200th post:

https://gegebearbear.wordpress.com/200th-post-can-you-believe-it/

The 200th post is below, but I’m gonna leave the page up too. I have removed any mention of a certain person who shall remain nameless. Enough said.

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We thought this post required something special. I find it difficult to believe we’ve been blogging since September 8, 2012! We have been on a journey since that date, but we are holding on strong and closer than ever.

This blog wasn’t our idea, but we have thoroughly enjoyed compiling information for post together. It truly has been therapeutic for both of us. Who would have thought that a counselor, specializing in neurological issues, would know what they were talking about? Maybe that was what we were paying them for? At least our insurance was…..

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We have done so well. Blogging has brought new friends into our lives and seen a few leave. The good seeds continue to take root as the friendships flourish. Others are like annual flowers, they are incredible at first then the heat of the sun fades their colors. Then you pull the annuals and throw them out to put new color in your garden. It is a shame all flowers and friendships cannot be timeless.  Enough said on the matter.

Barry and I continue to enjoy each blogger we have met on WordPress and stay sorrowful over those that did not work out. We have met some incredible people, who have taught us both a lot. Papazilla actually got me to debate a topic in writing, which is something I avoid like. I do not speak well, so there are certain things I do not freely take part in.

I have a rare genetic disorder. I felt so alone dealing with my illness at times, then my friends and family remind me I am not alone. The internet is an amazing tool to use to connect with people you may not meet normally. Barry is wonderful and my best choice to discuss my disease with. Thanks to everyone for being wonderful!

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BrainTumorThursday on Twitter has become a weekly part of my life. When I can take part, I do. When I can’t, I make sure one of my posts, about a brain tumor issue, is on the page. There is such a huge need for funding for research. Brain Tumors kill too many people yearly. I’m including a link to a national foundation for when you would like more information.

Twitter link:

http://paper.li/TumorWarrior/1343039984

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http://www.abta.org/about-us/

http://www.sbtf.org/home.html

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Two groups of hardworking people working to stop the pain of brain tumors. Please check them out. Barry and I take part regularly in the SBTF run/walk to raise money in Atlanta. We enjoy the get together. We also take part in a monthly support group for brain tumor patients. Very helpful group, when figuring life out after a brain tumor.

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http://www.emoryhealthcare.org

I’m including the website for the support group below, check them out. Very enjoyable group.

http://www.neurosurgery.emory.edu/BTSG/index.htm

Tons of extremely hardworking people, check them out!

Check out #BrainTumorThursday on Twitter. Just do a search. Do not forget the hash tag.

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Other health issues in constant need of funding are mini-strokes and strokes. As a nurse, I know what to look for and what they look like when occurring. Many people have health issues happen today and are clueless. They have no idea what is happening or whether to consider it an emergency or not. It is truly sad in my eyes that we are not more educated about our bodies and how we should respond to them when they scream at you,

 ‘HEY, I NEED ATTENTION!’

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I’m so glad I was home with Barry when his stroke occurred. He’s an extremely healthy, highly intelligent man. He did not have a clue or remember anything past us getting out of bed that morning. If he had been home alone, he would not be with us at the moment. God is good and decided he wasn’t finished with Barry. He helped me get the right people on to Barry, then the doctors and hospitals took over. New technology saved Barry’s life. Emory University Hospital had Barry in the procedure room before I made it to the hospital. I thank the Good Lord above for guiding the doctors in the proper care Barry needed. Although, his stroke continued once the clot was out of the picture, Barry is alive and thriving.

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http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/#mainContent

http://www.strokeassociation.org/STROKEORG/

http://www.stroke.org/site/PageNavigator/HOME

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Since starting our blog, our lives are finally calming down. My illness is settling into a routine of check-ups and Barry is getting stronger each day. Mom is even settling into our routine(Surprise, surprise)

Barry and I are about to embark on a new voyage in our lives. When he retires, we will have time to run around and do what we want. Travel; be lazy;  work in the yard; go to church; visit family; who knows, maybe we will see a movie at the theater…..I have a huge list of ideas, I just have to talk Barry into it. Barry will have a tough time adjusting to staying home. He has driven downtown(Atlanta) to work for over 30 years, sleeping past 6am is already a challenge for him on the weekends. After 9 years of marriage, I can say one thing about Barry L. Baynes. The sweet man despises change!

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If you do not know CPR, LEARN IT! You may need it some day!

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Round Four Finale

MM900295156Biopsy results are NEGATIVE! NO cancer. They still want me to have an MRI, because they do not have a solution for the problem. But no cancer!!!!!!!Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Saw endocrinologist today about thyroid scan. It was clear, but there is a lymph node she wants to follow. Which means she wants to schedule a thyroid scan! I hate the thought of another thyroid scan. You have to put your system into hypothyroidism before the test.

Last time, they were out of the injection to do this for you and I had to quit taking my medication for 3 weeks before my body converted to hypothyroidism. I was so weak, I could not walk. I was having to use my wheelchair to get around everywhere.

But I’ll do what I need to do to make sure I stay cancer-free. I may not be happy, but I’ll do it. I’m hoping Thyrogen is available and taken care of in 2 days.

Get results of the MRI on my left knee, next Tuesday. I have the feeling surgery is around the corner. But again, I’ll do what I have to do to stay healthy.

I can’t wait to get back to my full exercise routine. I miss it! Gonna light a fire under Barry’s fanny to get him moving with me. We may even get Maggie in on it!

Well, I’m putting this tablet down for the time being. We have to run an errand. Round 5 starts next week, with God leading the way. I hate to think where I’d be without the good Lord guiding us through this mess. Still taking things one day at a time. Thanks for your comments and support.

Round Four: Thyroid Scan Results/ Biopsy results

At 11:30am, we will be headed to the next appointment for the week. I’ll get my official thyroid scan results today. It’s in God‘s Hands as usual, but I am feeling rather positive today. The Neurosurgeon‘s visit has really lifted my spirits. Hopefully, Dr. M. will deliver similar news. I also received a message from the breast center, telling me she had good news about my biopsy. I left a message for her, so hopefully I will hear from her soon.

Have a good afternoon everyone. It was 60° yesterday and in the 30’s today with possible snow on Saturday. You have got to love the south. Daffodil’s are blooming already. Spring is coming. I can’t wait!

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Yearly Thyroid Ultasound: HAPPY DANCE!!!

I got the all clear after my ultrasound today. They thought I had an active lymph node in my neck, but I have been given a clean bill of health any thyroid cancer or lymph node issues for the moment. A big thank you to the good Lord above and to everyone on here for the courage and support you bring out in me daily! THANK YOU!!!!!!   🙂 

HAPPY DANCE! HAPPY DANCE!

My Brain Tumor is ruling my body today!

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To start the day off, I woke up a grumpy mess. Barry and my left arm told me why I was so tired this morning, when I got alert enough to listen.

Apparently, I spent the night hitting the wall, bed, myself and Barry, all night. My arm hurts so bad this morning. I also managed to bloody my nose last night and I have bruises on my forehead.

My left hand isn’t bruised yet, but it sounds and feels like it shoud be. Barry told me the dog wouldn’t get in the bed with us last night, so I was scaring my poor puppy during the night.

The morning did not get any better, my balance is terrible and my right hand is even shaking. My head feels like it will blow off at any second and the pain is radiating from the base of my skull, where the tumor is.

My eyes are somewhat focused, but a took a lot of exercising to get them there. It was mid-morning before I could focus. I took a nap, that hasn’t helped. Drugs and more sleep are next.Also a call to the neurologists office.

I probably will go crawl back in bed and hope this is gone tomorrow. I cannot stand when that dyuiiufdfv tumor takes over, I scare my husband. Since the stroke, he’s more sensitive and I hate he has to deal with me like this.

I should have known something was coming on. I spent yesterday stuck in giggle mode. Why couldn’t I get a day or two more of that. Everything was funny yesterday. I need to make sure I tell the neurologist’s office when they call.

Importance of Sleep

Main health effects of sleep deprivation (See ...

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Have you ever had one of those days when nothing goes you’re way?

Two days ago, I hadn’t rested well for over a week. I had a free day and thought”awww, I’ll get some rest”. Little did you know, the people I live with are making plans.

Mom was feeling good and decided she wanted to go work out and wanted me to go with her. She pops her head in my room and screeches wake-up, sleepyhead. I told her to “go away”. When she left, I was wide awake, so I got up and had breakfast. I tried my best to relax and sleep while she was gone. I was starting to doze off when she walked in again.

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Barry was not at home, so I let my mother know I was going to take a nap. I couldn’t get comfy in bed, so I headed for my favorite chair in the living room. I nicely asked her to let me nap.

I got comfy under my blanket and got ready for a good ole’ snooze. I was starting to relax and kinda dozey, when mom felt it necessary to check on me, in her high heeled boots. She does not have a clue how to walk quietly and on these hardwood floors. I politely told her I was fine and to please let me take a nap.

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She started some laundry while I was snoozing. The alarm on the machine kept going off. She got frustrated and woke me up. I got the washer going and headed back to sleep. It wasn’t 10 minutes later and it was buzzing again. I fixed the problem again and attempted to go back to sleep. The same cycle repeated so many times to the point that I was aggravated. Mom finally got her wash done and I got about an hours nap. All that managed to do was make me sleepier.

Barry walked in at 4pm, so it was time to get dinner going and spend time with my sweetheart.

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After dinner, I thought I’d relax s little and dozed off in my chair. About 2 hours later Barry had a meeting at the church. He woke me to say he was leaving. There I was, wide awake again.

I attempted to sleep while he was gone without success. He was home in a few hours and we got comfy for the evening. We sat in the living room watching NCIS and I dozed off again. I woke Barry to go to bed. I had just fallen asleep when he woke me up to let me know he was going to the living room, because he could not sleep. I tried for a few minutes to get back to sleep and I was wide awake again. I headed to the living room to watch TV around 3am.  I think I dozed off for a few minutes after 5am.

At 5:45am, Barry was rustling around in his chair and woke me up. It was time for him to get ready for work. I told him I was getting in the bed and if I was asleep when he left, please do not wake me to say goodbye. When I woke up at 1:30 pm the later that day, I felt a little better.

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I had some lunch, read a few emails and Barry was home early, due to the weather. He fixed the washing machine while I went back to sleep. I woke up in time to watch the Wednesday night church service on the internet and back to sleep I went. I woke around 1am and drug Barry off to bed. He was up and off to work this morning . Kissed me goodbye and I stayed in bed till 9am. I felt drugged getting up this morning, but I am not sleepy. I actually managed to get a day of rest. Thank you, God!