Parents: Raising them

Currently my father continues to have spells of v-fib and passing out. For some reason, his implanted pacemaker/defibrillator does not fire properly. 

I received a call from my sister, that it has happened again and he is in an ambulance on the way back to the hospital. She did not know his status once in the ambulance, but was on the way to the Emergency Room. She told me to stay home and take care of myself, that she swears she will call as soon as she has news.

I had a chemotherapy treatment last friday and a hospital emergency room is the last place I need to be at the moment. I’m exhausted and my bones ache like crazy, so I’m going to kick my feet up and rest.

My mother appears to be having an issue with the amount of attention my dad is getting from the three of us. She has a doctor’s follow-up after cataract surgery scheduled tomorrow. I asked if it was ok to reschedule, so I could be there with Kristie to help sign him into hospice. Mom agreed and went to her part of the house to makeba call.

When I went to tell her it was rescheduled, she was on the phone complaining that we are ignoring her needs and not getting her where she needs to be. She was talking to one of her sisters.

This is totally untrue. My dad is not well and not expected to live. I just do not get this childish stuff.  I know she has an ilness affecting her thought processes, but it is not exactly the same.

I asked her to please verbalize if she has an issue with a schedule change. She says she will. What else do we do?

14 thoughts on “Parents: Raising them

  1. You can pat yourself on the back, my dear. You are doing an amazing job juggling all these crud right now!!! xoxoxo

    • Thank you, I feel so guilty my sisters are handling daddy. I don’t wanna miss anytime with him. I wanna help, but I physically cannot do it. Dad knows I love him! Great post, lately..Luanne. How is the book coming? Jillxo

      • I’m on hiatus from the book this summer because I’m too busy and my mind is too scattered. But it’s good to have a mental break.
        Your dad knows you wish you could help!!

  2. My mother in law had Alzheimer’s and eventually we had to let things she said or did roll off of our shoulders although it is easier said than done when it is someone you love and your life is crashing in all around you while your desire right now is to be there for your dad. You are going through such a difficult time right now and I understand, my MIL was diagnosed shortly before I was diagnosed with breast cancer and I too had to go through dealing with both as well (she was living with us). My prayers go out to you as you deal with each of these issues. May I offer some friendly advice? Please take care of yourself first and foremost – then you will be able to not only heal from your own illness but be there for your mom and dad. God bless you with His peace, strength and comfort during this time.

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