Category Archives: literature/reading

My Sisters, Wonder Woman in disguise…..Bet you never knew there were three

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I am the middle child of three girls. We grew up in a small-town called Winder, Georgia, in the late seventies into the eighties. We are quite a mix, but we make it work. We all have excessively busy lives. We live within 30 minutes of each other and hardly ever see one another.

I’ll start with the oldest, Sandy, Wonder Women number one. She is hardworking, smart,detail oriented, sweet, loving, caring, kind-hearted, meticulous, adores her children and grandchidren, keeps an emmaculate home, takes incredible care of her husband, whom is wheelchair-bound from a spinal cord tumor. Dennis gets around and takes care of himdelf during the day, he even drives. He manages several household chores and always makes sure Sandy has a hot meal ready at night. She is the secretary at her church and drives a school bus for the county they live in.

She likes things done her way or no way; she doesn’t care to see things go wrong; she believes it is ok to plan gatherings the day before she wants to have it; she tells you what time something will start or what time she will arrive, but is always on average two hours late; but on the other hand. She has my love and respect, but I have to admit, I do not know how she does it. I would have packedup and run away a long time ago. She is one tired, incredible woman and I love her dearly. 

Our relationship has changed since I got sick. I miss the relationship Sandy and I had. We will probably never get it back. I had enough trouble accepting the “new me”, how can I expect others to understand and accept the changes I deal with daily. I just want to be included. If I am able, I’ll be there!

Brain injuries make a person vulnerable to infections and other things that could be deadly. That fact has kept me closer to home in the past few years. I’m a great aunt, now. I’d love to be able to play and have fun with them, just as I did her kids growing up. We had some great times.

Enough of that. Let’s get to Wonder Women number two, my younger sister, Kristie. Kristie is sweet, kind-hearted, loving, caring, smart, adores her dhildren and husband, focused, detail-oriented, hard-working, and is currently using her super powers to take care of father, who is gravely ill. Sandy snd I have helped when we could, but it hasn’t been close to enough to give her a break.

Kristie surprised me after I had brain surgery, she visited daily for a few weeks and cooked several meals, so we wouldn’t have to worry about it. She helped get me to rehab when Barry had a conflict. This was so sweet. Not that she hasn’t been sweet in the past,  Barry and I just were not expecting it. Thank you, Kris!

Kristie has a quick temper and let you know when she thinks you are wrong. I did not witness this, but she took a 6’6″ man to the ground and beat him up. Mom called her a “lightening bolt” when getting her up for school in our younger days. She still carries a bolt in her back pocket.

I love both my sisters with all my heart and will do anything in the world for both of them. Thank you both for being there when I have needed you! I could not have gotten better sisters if I had ordered them from a catalog. God truly blessed me in the sister department! Thank you, Dear Lord for my sisters!

Letting Things Go

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Our natural instinct, when confronted with an uncomfortable situation, is to fight to defend yourself or someone else’s honor.

One of the hardest things on earth to do is admit when you are wrong. There are times when our judgement is impaired by medical, personal, financial or other issues beyond our control.

There are times in life when our mouths speak before it connects with our brains. Unnecessary hurtful things can come out at times like these. God wants us to be kind to one another, do good things for each other, he doesn’t want people arguing over childish, petty behavior.

Our televisions and radios are packed full of garbage. This gives our kids open reign over what is right and wrong. Unless, we as parents, have teach our children the difference, how are they supposed to know the difference?

As an adult, I’m doing my best to adopt a new policy. I do have  medical issues, that can make me sound upset when I am not. I cannot control it. Barry and I work weekly on helping each other manage our learn to manage our new policy.

When I come across a difficult situation, I let it go! If I somone doesn’t understand what I am saying, I take a step back and say “Hold on a sec, I think that was taken the wrong way, let me repeat that”.

I have too many stressors in my life to let childish behavior get to me, I let it go and get on with my life. Having a medical condition does not give you an excuse to do ugly things and disrespect other people, just “LET IT GO!” Do what is right for you. Take care of yourself and let the little stuff go. You will feel a lot better.

Writing through Cancer: For the Week of July 14, 2013: Music is Good Medicine by Jill Baynes

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After my brain surgery, I longed for the ability to sing. The side effects caused from the unremovable portion of the tumor, took my voice away. The tumor left in my head is pressing into cranial nerves, causing many of numerous parts of my body to malfunction from the shoulders up. The one thing I miss the most, continued to be the ability to sing.

I sang in chior as a child at church and continued into adult choir. As a middle-schooler, they offered chorus. I tried out and made the chorus in middle-school, then continued through high school. Apparently, I was blessed with a high soprano voice. At one point, I could actually hit a high C.

I loved to sing in the car. Especially when I was all by myself. I’d crank the radio up and sing my head off! I loved it. I miss it!

Barry and I found a church home locally last year. Since singing at church, I have been able to at least put words together that comes out like singing. It is not pretty, but the words come in a gersion of song. Thanks to our weekly worship, the good Lord is helping me find my voice again. I pray to thank Him for his blessings daily and sing my heart out weekly. Hopefully, my voice will continue to strengthen. In my case, music has definitely been good medicine.

Writing through Cancer: For the Week of July 7, 2013: The Heroes in Our Lives

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Heros come in many shapes and sizes.  They can be man or in some cases animal. They can be simple or complex, like your favorite movie star or super hero. Many definitions for such a tiny little word.

A hero can be someone you admire, someone that has actually saved your life or helped you through a rough patch in your life. Anywhere you look in this world, you could see a hero.

I would say I have several heroes in my life. Maggie, our treasured family pet, on several occassions has saved me from burning the house down.

After brain surgery, I experienced a little problem with attention. I’d put something on to cook and forget about it. Maggie quickly reminded me when something was not right in the kitchen.

There was another time Maggie came to the rescue. My mother had fallen in her bedroom, she was calling out for help, but I could not hear her. Maggie quickly let me know something was wrong and I was able to help mom quickly. Thank goodness she was ok.

Another person I consider my hero is my husband. Emotionally, my husband is my hero. He has been by my side, the past few years; helping with whatever I need without a single grumble or complaint, he is the sweetest man on earth, compassionate, loving, caring, he keeps me laughing and is always supportive. I do not know what I’d do without him.

My dad is next on my list of heros. He is sweet, loving, and has such a huge heart. Growing up, dad left home, to work, before we got up and did not get home until we were in bed again. We only saw uim on the weekends. He had a second job he worked on the weekends. It was nice, because we could go spend time with him. Thank you, Pop for working so hard and giving us the life we had. I love you more than you know.

Mom was not a happy camper when he went to the bowling alley, but he worked so much, one night a week to do something he enjoyed did not feel like a bad idea to me. Mom and dad divorced when Kristie was a teenager. Pop retired soon after that. As pop got older, he joined the flea market crowds and opened a booth to sale the items he was collecting. He is currently not doing well and is fighting tooth and nail to hold onto his independence. I pray that he knows the Good Lord as his Savior and is ready for his place in heaven. He says he is. The Good Lord will show him the way when the time comes.

The only “military” heros I am aware of, in the family, are my Uncle Gerald and my Uncle Ken. Both are from my dad’s side of the family. Uncle Gerald was killed somewhere in the Phillipines before I was born. Uncle Ken was the uncle I never really got to know growing up. His official demeanor scared me a little as a child, and then we never really had an opportunity to get to know each other. It is my own fault, I wish I had taken the time to know him. I can’t do this any longer, he passed away a few years ago. I have the honor of knowing my Uncle Ken is buried in Arlington Cemetary in Washington, D.C..

My hero list is short, but it is a tough list to beat. The people on my list would probably laugh at me for calling them heros, but in my book, they are topnotch!

Peace and Quiet

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As I sit here,  totally alone (with the exception of the dog and fish), a strange feeling comes over my body. I’m not sure I recognize it. I have the remote control to myself,  no one is fighting for my chair, my blanket is mine, a pillow comfy under my neck, I think I have forgotten what this is called.

Could this strange sensation be relaxation? I haven’t relaxed in such a long time, it feels odd. I am actually getting sleepy. Maggie is already asleep in Barry’s chair. Shotgun is swimming  happily around in his clean tank. The sun is shining in the windows making everything nice snd cozy. I think I might take a nap.

I love my husband. He was a sweetheart to take mom to the Surgery Center for her eye surgery. While I have a few peaceful hours to myself, he has to sit and wait. I’m getting a sore throat and not feeling well, my orders are to rest. So, ladies and gentlemen, enjoy your day! I am off to sleepytown. Sweet Dreams, all!

One of those days!

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Ever have a day you’d like to hide from? Crawl back in bed to sleep the day away? Or just crawl under the bed to hide from the world? Well, my day started off with a thump. That thump was me hitting the floor, face first, when I tried to turn over in the living room chair I had fallen asleep in and BAM! Flat on my face in the floor.

That was 5am. Three hours later, with Barry’s assistance, I almost tumbled backwards getting out of the tub. Barry managed to get the situation under control before we both took a second bath.

After getting ready, I had an appointment this morning, along with Barry and Mom. Luckily, mom and I were headed in the same direction. Barry had to head to Northside. Barry attended the first appointment with me.

On the way back to the truck, I went down hard on my right side, after tripping on the handicap ramp that needs attention. I skinned my right elbow, took the skin off the little toe on my left foot and bruised my ribs on the right back, from landing hard on the curb.

I think when mom is finished at the eye doctor, I’m going home and back to bed. Someone is trying to tell me to rest today. Hope everyone is having a better day than I am. If someone sees that truck that ran over me this morning, get the tag number please!

Writing through cancer: For the Week of June 30, 2013: Rediscovering Summer’s Joys

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Through our health crisis’ s, Barry and I did not think  a lot about what we were losing, we focused on changing our behaviors,  unknowingly bringing a few Summer’s Joys back into our lives.

Gone are the days of lying on the couch, doing nothing to benefit ourselves. We have a plan for each day of the week. When our schedule is not saturated with appointments, we find an activity and get involved. We have found a local farmer’s market that carries items from around the world. We are enjoying experimenting with our new discoveries. There are several fruits from around the world, that might loook a little strange, but are quite tasty.

We walk, we work out, we have found a therapy pool to try out this summer, we garden, we feed the birds in the yard and plant things especially for the wildlife around. We hope to catch a few photos of them nibbling on the goodies we have provided.

We have a few special projects planned for the yard,  but will have to wait on chemo, radiation and the good southern sun to cool off before we can get started. The Georgia heat and humidity has to die down to be productive outside. It will drain you in a flat second if you aren’t careful. I think getting the cast off will help a lot.

Dad has been really sick this summer. The doctor has actually not given him long to live. He is being discharged home on Hospice care. Been busy trying to help as much as possible.  Poor Kristie is worn out. I wish we could help more. We are being as supportive as possible.

We have planted a few Japanese Maple Trees, that are looking incredible. I love watching what we plant grow. I can’t wait to work on our butterfly garden. I love watching the flutterflies and hummingbirds go wild on the blossoms.

With chemo and radiation, our summer joy’s will be early fall joys this year, but hey….we have something to look forward to.

I guess I was ready!

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I feel like the only thing I have accomplished today is a headache and a serious need for something to eat other than crackers with a side of room-temp water.

A lady across from us was a mess. It broke my heart. Her doctor had just been in and told her some bad news. So we watched and listened as she cried and called her relatives to let them know. It was so sad. The nurses could have pulled the curtain for to allow for privacy.

Barry is happy as a lark. TV all to himself and a chair to snooze in, although it did not compare to his recliner. We have nine minutes left on this infusion and we are headed home. Woohoo! I miss my Maggie. I miss home. Being here for the reasons I am here, has made me realize how much I appreciate being home.

I can’t wait to get away from all these medicinal odors and get into my cushy chair at home. I have a lot of email to return and phone calls to make.

We have decided when we make our first billion or two, we’ll buy new chairs for the Infusion Center. The sad thing is the number of patients that have gone through those chairs to wear them out. Cancer effects more lives than anyone realizes.

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