Category Archives: Nonsense

Daily Prompt: Goals

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When you started your blog, did you set any goals? Have you achieved them? Have they changed at all?

Starting a blog was not our idea. Barry and I started sessions with a neuropsychological counselor, Dr. J. Since Barry and I had both recently suffered from serious Neurological health issues, we were butting heads regularly and could not decide how to solve our issues.  At the time, she felt we needed a place to write our emotions and situations down. She felt Barry and I would adjust better, to our new lives, if we put got everything out in the open and talked out the issues we wrote about.  

Goal number one would be for us not to hold our emotions in. When a problem or issue occurs, document it. Write down everything, every detail possible. She did not specifically mean a blog, but a journal. I chose a blog, rather than the other, to really get feedback from others on what Barry and I were facing. 

I believe our goal with a journal / blog met and will continue to be met. Barry was uneasy to start. He has never been one to share his emotions. He is learning that we are two new people and that we have to learn to like the new “Barry and Jill”. We are both learning to look at the big picture, called life. For a while, we forgot we needed to care for each other, not just meet our own needs.  We are also figuring out the way to co-exist and falling in love with each other all over again.  

Goal number two was to spend at least an hour per day alone, together. We spent a few weeks having lunch out, daily. Applebees our favorite lunch spot for months.  The staff knew us on site and what our regular order was. As Barry’s health improved, we increased our time and headed to the gym and when able, we added a walking routine to our daily regimen. We continue our exercise routine today. We are slowly working on gardening projects around the house. Our yard has paid the price for our illnesses and we would like to slowly get it up to par.

Barry struggled with retirement. He attempted to go back to work, but was never able to make it past part-time. By mid-day, he was unable to control the stress. He finally bit the bullet and retired at the end of April. In close to 30 days, he almost has his “Honey-do” List completed. Retirement has energized him. I love it!  

The neuropsychological counselor we were seeing had to close her practice due to an illness. Barry and I continue to follow her advice and our relationship grows stronger daily. I am currently facing another serious illness. Barry is being a doll and extremely supportive everyday! 

Thank you, Dr. J! You are with Barry and I daily. God bless you!!!!!

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Mom Will Be Home Sunday-sang to tune of “Nothing could be finer”

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MOM WILL BE HOME SUNDAY

Nothing could be finer,

Than to have Mom in North Carolina,

In the morn…..rning…………..

There is nothing greater,

cuz she’ll be gone till three days later in the night,

the next day will be alright…………

cuz she’ll sleep till two days later with her cat…..

we do not mean to sound displeased,

cuz the house has been ours for three wonderful days and nights….

and we managed to keep the cat and dog aliveeeeeeeee……….

*************************************************

I’m happy she is going out-of-town to have some fun, but I am even more thrilled, to have Barry and the house to myself. Am I being awful? I’m loving the time with alone with Barry, but I developed a little fever and running back and forth to doctor’s offices more than usual. They are trying to figure out where the temperature is coming from. It appears that I have an infection in the surgical incision under my arm and 102° temp is coming from. I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck(a very large truck). On antibiotics and am seeing surgeon at lunch tomorrow.Wish me luck!

Post Lumpectomy: Day 9 pathology report from Dr. S

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When you go to a doctor’s visit for a pathology report, life can get a little scary. They tell you they caught it early and it will be easy to handle once out.

I’m not worried about the results, my life is in the hands of Our Glorious Heavenly Father. I’m ready for whatever he has planned for me.

I’m getting a bit frustrated with things going wrong with me. I’m especially frustrated with the constant need doctors have to cut holes in my body. It will not take long for my body to look like a road map of scars. I need to make an appointment with a dermatologist next. I have a few places that need to be checked out.

Cowdens Syndrome is manageable, but you have to stay on top of your screenings. Miss one could mean a major life change or your life. At the moment, my head is spinning and I can not turn it off.

There are so many health issues going on with me at the moment, it is hard to judge what to handle first. The priority at the moment, is the breast cancer. My knee would have to be next and the growth on my tongue is third. Within the breast cancer treatment, I have been getting treatment to the left knee. I have an appointment next week concerning my tongue. We’ll see.

Received the pathology report today from surgery. My lymph nodes are clear, but the cancer had spread in the tissue around the tumor. I have to have another operation to let the doctor remove more tissue.

Unfortunately, the process I’ve just been through is about to repeat and could repeat numerous times until she is happy with the amount of tissue she has removed. I’m not happy with the thought of more surgery, but I do not want this mess growing in my body.

Well supper is ready and I’m off to serve it up. Have a great evening…….

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Things I thought I would never able to say, ‘Yes, I did that’ , in my life time

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If you think you are about to read this ‘naughty girl’ confession list, prepare to be disappointed. I’m afraid to admit I’m one of the tamest women left on earth. I should have titled this post, ‘The things I should be embarrassed by or ashamed to admit I did’, rather than the title I posted. Well here goes, sorry to disappoint you……

1. I called out sick at work, when I just did not want to go.

2. I am currently wearing a kotex pad under my left arm, to cover one surgical incision from my breast cancer surgery.

I sprang a leak. I felt like I needed a plumber. The doctor’s answer was to cover it with a kotex pad to handle the drainage until my next appointment.

3. When I walk briskly, I sound like a bottle of water being shaken up.

4. When driving a drunk friend home, once upon a time, he attempted to grab the wheel and struck me across the face. I pulled over to the side of I-85 and put them out of my car.

5. I have had to send money to a friend stuck in Biloxi, Miss. without a dime to get home.

6. I once let someone get mad at me because I did not like hanging around with them. They got mad and quit coming around. I felt so bad, but I didn’t have the nerve to tell them to go away.

7. I let myself get into a situation at a party once, that a woman thought I was interested in her. Embarrassing….

8. When I went to pick a blind date up once, they attacked, I fought them off and ran. As I ran he tore the shirt and bra off my body. I was running through a parking lot half-naked.

9. In my single days, I let a woman tell an overly tipsy man I was hers, to get him to leave me alone.

10. Left a restaurant/bar with a couple of friends one night. When we got to the parking lot, one of the women I was with, started taking off her clothes as we walked to the car. To date, I haven’t asked “why?”.

11. I watched a girlfriend walk over to a man, whom had hit on her, pull a can of ‘Campbells’  soup out of the bust of her dress and hand it to him. She asked him to leave her alone and told him that he had the only thing he’d ever get from her in his hand.

12. My ex-husband talked me into ‘making-out’ in a casket at a funeral home in a small town in Georgia.

13. I corrupted my new husband in the dark on a boat on Lake Lanier, many years ago. That is all I’ll say about that.

14. I have attended the Masquerade Club in Atlanta, Ga. Not proud of being talked into going.

15. I used to love karaoke.

All of the above statements are true, 90% of them happened within 6 months of my divorce. I decided after that time, that I had put myself and my body through enough craziness. I let the true, sane me come back out to be the decent person I am.

‘

My experiences with people with disabilities. Why are we so uncomfortable around them?

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I read this and felt like I had heard another side of the story, since our friends abandoned us. I just wanted to share this post wit my readers! Great job, Hera Pereira…..wonderful post….Jill

herapereira's avatarHera Pereira

Moments of Kindness Growing up,I was always uncomfortable with people with disabilities. I would surreptitiously stare at them and turn away quickly when they caught me staring. I always wondered how tough their life was (make no mistake, it is a tough life). I cannot forget two encounters with people with disabilities. they changed my life forever and made me respect and appreciate them.

First encounter
2006- In my final year at the university, I was transferred to a new dorm. My next door neighbours included the cutest girl who used leg braces and crutches. Everyone treated her like an egg, so I did too. I felt so nervous around her because I was not sure how to address her. I always wanted to ask whether she was born that way or acquired it through an accident but I Knew asking was out-of-place (in English, none of my business). One…

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You cannot catch my brain tumor, so please do not discount me!

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I have no problem with the“nice”coming out in people, but where does all this negativity in people come from.

When I was younger, it was odd to see a person with a disability out shopping. I, personally, think it is wonderful to see senior adults and other disabled people getting out and doing for themselves. Makes you feel good.

I ran into a couple of the most negative human beings on earth this week. Ironically, while out shopping. I was using the motorized shopping carts in both instances. At Kroger, the lady actually raised her voice and accused me of attempting to run over her when I only drove around her to get down the aisle.

Then at Wal-Mart, I was turning to go to the next aisle when I almost hit a woman and her shopping cart head on. I said “excuse me” and started around her. Her response was to state, “Good grief, I said I was sorry!” If one more person tells me to let someone have the cart, that really needs it. I think I’ll scream at them. But I do enjoy the look on their faces when I “tell them to tell it to my brain tumor!”

Priceless……I still am not sure I understand either one, but what can I do? I intend to keep helping with the household duties, which include shopping. Just because my body doesn’t work like it used to, doesn’t mean I can’t shop!

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POST: 300

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sunflowers

sunflowers

Just wanted my 300th Post to be summery! Thanks to everyone out there for your kindness and support. You are a fabulous group of people! Keep it up!

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Growing Up in the Shadows, Part 2

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Stairsteps3

Stairsteps3

My sister’s and I are now adults. There have been many changes. Once, Sandy and I were close, but I have become much closer to Kristie as we grew up.

Sandy married early and started a family early. She and her husband, Dennis, have twin boys and a girl. All but one are out on their own with their families started. Derrek is the hold out, he is looking for his perfect mate. I have no doubt he will find her eventually.

Someone Dennis worked with, introduced me to my first husband. I was head-over-hills in love. We were married and I moved to Madison, Ga., lovely little town. I discovered while in Madison, I missed Kristie terribly. Twelve years later I was divorced and living back in my childhood home.

While Sandy and I were doing the marriage thing in Madison, Kristie got stuck dealing with mom and dad as they filed for divorce. For years, mom firmly stated, the minute Kristie was out of high school she was leaving.

Two weeks, to date of Kristie’s graduation, mom packed up and left. I felt so bad. She had been threatening for years, I guess I never thought she’d. Mom was really good with acting on her present tense threats, not her future threats. She generally forgot what she had threatened.

I was proud of Kristie, she dealt with the mess at home, started school, helped daddy through finding an apartment and moved in with him. Pop is a pack rat and living with him was not easy. Kristie made a forever friend at school and her home became Kristie’s second home. It was good to see her happy for a change.

Mom met and married her second husband sometime in this period. Just thinking of my mother on a date is scary, but actually getting married. When we would call to talk to her, he would claim he did not know her. Things really did not get better.

We found out somethings from his past, that made Sandy and her husband refuse to let mom see their kids until she divorced him. This only made mom mad. Mom went to Sandy’s one day and flattened all her car tires.

She proceeded to The Office of the Department of Family and Children’s Services. She reported to a case worker that Sandy and Dennis were mentally abusing their children by not letting them see their grandmother.

What mom didn’t realize was that she was talking to a close friend of mine. My husband being in Law Enforcement, she called him the minute mom left her office. She told my ex that my sisters and I needed to go to the courthouse to have mom committed for incompetence. The sad thing is, back then, neither Sandy, Kristie or I had the nerve to do it. We knew what we’d have to deal with when they let her out!

Not long after that, Kristie met her husband. They were married and starting a family early. Kristie and I found out we were pregnant at the same time, about a months difference. I miscarried for the fifth time and Kristie delivered Jonny. He is like my child.

This pregnancy was the end of my marriage. My husbands attitude changed and it started to effect our marriage. It wasn’t long after that we filed for divorce.

Sandy stayed busy with her happy home and wonderful kids. It used to aggravate me beyond means for my mother to drive past my home, to Sandy’s. She would then call me and say “get out here to see me,” even as an adult, my mother put me in the shadows because I didn’t have grandchildren.

Sandy has worked hard and has a beautiful family to be proud of. Kristie has done the same. She has two beautiful boys she is busy raising. They have both done incredible jobs being moms.  I spent these years focusing on my career and working. I’ve done a great job spoiling their kids rotten. Thanks to Julie-bug, I can start spoiling the second generation.

Kristie had been married a few months when I got divorced. I moved back into my childhood bedroom and attempted to get my life together. Jonathan was the light of my life. When he was old enough, I took him everywhere.

His bottle was my alarm clock every morning, he would beat me in the head saying “Gege” until I got up. He towers over me know. We had such special times together when he was younger. I wish I was able to do the same things with Marek, the little man of the family. I miss the old me, but the new me gets better every day.

I had several jobs until I found the place I loved. I was still in that profession when I was forced to retire due to the brain tumor.

This position required me to train people and do a lot of one-on-one speaking with families and corporate officials. I have been brought out of my shell. Taking care of myself wasn’t easy, but I learned I could do it alone.

Not long after starting this position, I met Barry. Little did I know, I had just met the love of my life. Barry was the man I would spend the rest of my life with. He was sweet, handsome, funny and such s gentlemen.

Our one quirk, is his son, Frank, hates me. I have done everything I know to do for that child and he still hates every inch of ground I walk on.

Our health issues started with Barry, but his had been under control, with medications, for years. The hospital trips started with me and the brain tumor, then the thyroid cancer, then it switched to Barry’s heart valve, back to my gallbladder and knee scope; next came Barry’s stroke and my breast cancer. We’re gonna stop there for now. I don’t want to give any body parts ideas…we’re running out!

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