Tag Archives: Love

For the Week of June 16, 2013: A Father’s Legacy: Lee Van Hayes, my father and Barry L. Baynes, my hubby

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My daddy

My daddy


This is reblogged from earlier this last month. The part about Barry, my husband is new. The Two Important Fathers in my Life! All fathers are important, these are just the two big guys in my life.

I speak a lot about my mother and the rest of my family, while Pop sits quietly in the background. He has always been quiet, but he is always there. Ready when you need him. He gives great hugs!

My mom and Pop divorced over 20 years ago. Daddy was head over heels in love with mom, but she just could not be happy. I’m not sure mom knows how to be happy.

Pop is a sweet, sensitive man that likes to stay busy. His body is breaking down and he still wants to go. My sisters and I just want uim to take a little better care of himself in the process.

Growing up, Pop would be gone when we got up in the mornings and did not get home until we were in bed asleep. He made sure we spent time together on the weekends. We picniced and went fishing a lot. I still love it today.

He and mom planted a garden yearly. Our punishment during the summer month was weeding the garden.
Each one of us does some form of gardening today.

With Pop working so much, I wasn’t sure how he felt about us or if he knew we were alive. It was my childish mind not understanding, he was out working his hiney off, so that we could live the life we were living. We vacationed 2 weeks at the beach every summer, when I wanted knew clothes all I did was ask.
I can remember the first time my daddy told me he thought I was pretty. I was ready to go to a dance, all dressed up in my 80’s garb. Homecoming dance, I think. Pop came in from work early. He walked over and kissed me on the cheek. Then said, “I think I just realized how pretty you are. Have great time tonight, honey.” I had to redo my makeup. But it is a moment with my daddy, I’ll always remember.
HAPPY FATHER’ S DAY, POP! You are the best!

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Now to my sweet husband. He is a father. He has a son from his first marriage. When Barry and I met, Frank was in High School. When we married, Frank was not happy and has not made life easy for himself or us, including his own mother.

It didn’t matter what I attempted to do, Frank decided long ago he did not want me as part of his life and did everything possible to get rid of me. It has been his choice to not be part of our lives. I feel horrible, if it is my fault. But it has been his choices and actions that has gotten us to where we are today. I truly wish something could be done. Barry and I pray for him nightly! Hopefully as he grows up a little more, things will change. Both Barry and he deserve better!

Barry is warm, caring, giving, highly-intelligent and loving man. Frank’s mom suffered from health issues after his birth, so Barry was in charge of 90% of the raising. Most of us are either a lot like our mother or father. Frank looks just like his father, but has his mother’s personality. That is as far as I go on this topic.

I do not know what words to say, to make this day easier.

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY, HONEY! You are the best!

Love you guys, Jill Baynes, your daughter, Jill and Barry, your wife, Jill (in case you forgot my name)

Daily Prompt: Person of the Year

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You’re asked to nominate someone for TIME’s Person of the Year. Who would it be, and why?

My nominee for Time’s Person of the Year would be my best friend, the love of my life, Mr. Barry L. Baynes. He does not feel he would deserve such an honor, but in my eyes he was the only person I would consider nominating. He has been my night in shining armor for several years.

Barry suffered a massive right-sided stroke in Dec. 2012. I almost lost him. His percerverence and determination not to let that stroke get him down, has given me strength and will to push through the health issues I have currently and really push myself into recovery and staying healthy.

Barry has been my love, my companion and my chauffer through what feels like millions of appointments with numerous doctors.

We started the year off running in January,  with a referral to a breast specialist at Emory over something suspicious on a mammogram. We were off to learn our way around another section of Emory University Hospital‘s clinics. (By now, Barry and I should have a wing dedicated to whatever we want.)

When Barry was not feeling well, he was there, never complaining always supportive. He gets stronger (from the stroke) daily. I can see the changes. He strength never faltered.

He has been my rock, he let me draw on his strength as I needed to. He was always positive. As doctors delivered news we really did not want to hear, Barry had a smile on his face. He tried to keep my mood elevated the best he could.

When I knew he wasn’t feeling his best, he tried to not let it show. He is always encouraging and loving.

All of the above are reasons, Mr. Barry L. Baynes, would be my nominee for Time’s Person of the Year. I could not think of anyone more deserving of this award.

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Jill and Barry Baynes

Writing through Cancer for week of June 2, 2013: Hope is a thing with feathers!

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This is a continuation of our post earlier this week:

That sweet little boy at the Birthday Party, looking and hoping he could find more presents hidden within the gift wrap piled on the floor. He was frantically searching; he was positive, he would find one more present. he was showing he had total faith in his situation. His thoughts alive with the feeling of hope.  He just knew he would find one more present. So adorable searching.

Before we had wrapping paper all over the house, we got a bag and played gift wrap basketball. Making a game out of the cleanup, let him see there were no more presents. he was able to focus on the gifts he received and the house full of people who came to celebrate with him and his sister.

Hope covers many aspects of  our lives.Dealing with a serious illness brings hope into your life in several ways. you hope the illness will not get bad, you hope to live through whatever illness you are going through, you hope your families will be there for you and not change their minds as you get worse, you hope the people you have called friends for years will be there when you need them.

There is so much hope involved in illnesses. It is hard to deal with hope, when you are fighting so hard to stay healthy and you find yourself surrounded by people you cannot count on. You need to remember that God is always there. Giving your troubles and burdens to God must be done with total faith, then we can continue our walk in life with the assurance that when trouble comes; we know God is there and that whatever the new trouble is,God is never surprised, for He is with you.

Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the middle of the sea. If your faith is not strong, we lose hope and start looking for a quick fix.

Psalm 46:1-God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble

Psalm 31:24-Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the Lord

Psalm 33:18-Behold, the eye of the Lord is upon them that fear him, upon them that hope in his mercy;

Psalm 33:22-Let thy mercy, O Lord, be upon us, according as we hope in thee.

Psalm 38:15-For in thee, O Lord, do I hope: thou wilt hear, O Lord my God.

                 King James Version (KJV)     

It is that faith,  is our Hope and knowledge that God knows when we are on this rocky bumpy road, and holding that faith is when God puts his loving arms around us and smooths out the road ahead.

Though we may never know the why, but really do we need to know, because this is where we gain Wisdom as we talk to God and, no matter what comes our way, you know God will see you through it.

Through my illness, I have struggled with worry, stress, and anything else that made me worry. It wasn’t until I started praying for hope, mercy and understanding that I was able to but my health in God’s hands. I recently went through a breast cancer ordeal that I had no worries about I knew it would be ok. God was doing the hard work for me.

I am currently struggling with another issue. I am handing it over to the good Lord tonight hoping he can lead me in the right direction with re-motivating my partner in crime, I’m wearing my husband out. Barry suffered a stroke a few years ago and is doing wonderful, but he’s worn out. I need to see what I can do to give him a break. We both need a break, but that will have to wait a little longer. I do not know what I would do without him.

One day at a time!

Another Mom moment….Love ’em

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While mowing the grass yesterday,  I was unable to make a sharp turn and I think I hit Mom’s pineapple tree she is attempting to grow in our Georgia red clay!

While discussing that I may have hit it with her, she appeared a little sleepy. I was attempting to apologize, when Mom looked at me funny. I asked what was wrong and she asked me why I was in her refrigerator with the lawnmower. Then proceeded tomtell me to leave her pineapple alone. She told me she was trying to grow her own, but it might take awhile.

It was like the light bulb over her head turned on and shebstarted lsughing. She then asked where thst came from and requested we get her home quick. She said she needed to nap badly. Two minutes later, she was sound asleep.

I just love that goofy women!

Jill and Barry Baynes

Coco, our lastest housemember

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Coco is an adorable little Tabby cat, we got for mom at Mother’s Day. Something for her to take care of and keep her company. It was working great, so far.  Thst is ifnpoor Coco csn durvive mom’s memory.

She is constsntly locking her in closets and other rooms. She is becoming a pro at finding open doors, so mom spends a large majority of her day looking for that sweet little kitty. Mom spends the rest of the day trying to kerp our boxer from chasing her kitty around the house. Maggie thinks Coco is playing or Coco thinks Maggie is playing, but they make quite a ruckus.

I think they will eventually get along. It is just taking time.  Mom thinks Coco talks to her. She says “Hello” and “I love you”. Bsrry andnI are yet to eitness these feats, but who knows. Barry lives csts, so he is enjoying her being around.

Jill and Barry Baynes

Shopping with Mom

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The three of us went for a few groceries this afternoon.  Mom needed some milk snd had forgotten to pick it up, so we stopped at our friendly corner Kroger store.

We sat in the car while mom ran in. I pulled the car forward a little to look at a vine they had for sale. Looked like Mini-Black-Eyed Susans. Very cool looking vine and I want one!!!

While checking thenvine out, we didn’t see mom come out of the store and get into another car.  She had been sitting there for maybe 10 minutes when the owner of the car appeared.  They were curious ad to whom was in their car and started demanding answers loud enough that it got my attention.

Barry hurried out of the car to mom’s rescue as a police car pulled up. Twenty-five minutes later and avstetn lecture from Officer Goodguy, we headed home. Poor mom was shaking like a leaf.

The Officer meant well, but he didn’t tell us anything we were not stressing over already. The car she had gotten in could have taken off with her; she could have walked off, or dhe could have been hurt. Every horrible thing posdible wad running through my mind. Thank the good Lord she was ok.

Jill and Barry Baynes

Not sure this is an Urban Legend, but I found out it is true….the hard way!

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Ever heard that if you stick a snapping turtle to a person, they will not let go until they hear thunder rumble? Well, let me tell you about a fishing trip when I was 2 years old. My sister Sandy was 4 years old when this occurred.

Pop caught a turtle and let Sandy play with it. For years, Dad had told us all these crazy stories about animals. One of those stories listed above. Mom and dad were not paying attention.Little Miss Sandy decided to try this tale out. When I turned around, quickly, Sandy stuck the turtle to my stomach, right at the top of my ribs.

That turtle latched on, Sandy screamed let it go and ran. I immediately started to bleed and I added to the screaming. Mom put her pole down and came to check on us. A storm was blowing up. At the moment mom reached me, there was a rumble of thunder and that crazy turtle let go and fell to the ground. Mom picked it up and threw it in the water. She yelled at Dad it was time to go. We packed up and headed home. I still have a scar today.

As you can tell, we had a little more freedom as children when we were younger!

 

Another story took place in our backyard. We had a little plastic pool in the backyard to splash around and cool off. Sandy decided she wanted to teach me how to swim. Mom said that was fine. Sandy and I filled the pool up and got in our swimsuits. Sandy’s idea of teaching me to swim was me on my stomach lying on the bottom of the pool with her sitting on my back. I’m just thankful mom checked on us before I drowned. Needless to say we were not allowed in the pool alone anymore. I still thought my big sister was the coolest thing on earth.