Tag Archives: Georgia

Please Forgive My Absence

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Please forgive my absence for the past few days. Imagine the nerve of life getting in the way. I’ll admit I let the “poor pitiful me’s” get in the way. When my favorite urologist found my new problem, my mood kinda hit the toilet with a big splash. I’ve had 2 days of sulking and I’m tired of being the only “stick in the mud” at the party.

Time for a reality check. Yes, I am sick. Yes, I hurt all day everyday. Yes, I have to see a lot of doctors. But………I love the Lord, I adore my husband, I have a loving, happy, sometimes screwed family, I have 2 great pets (a dog that thinks she is human and a fish that will come to the top of the bowl when called), I have a great life.

Why I let myself get all down and depressed, I’ll never understand. One doctor I see told me to quit worrying about getting upset. He said it’s not like I don’t have a million things to worry about.

Maybe all this studying and work I’ve done, on turning my issues over to the Lord, is working. It was much easier to turn this over to God, than in the past. I really think that listening and learning in church is the way to go. Growing up, I was more concerned with who was at church, than what I was learning. I’m learning a lot at Victory Baptist Church, they are such a truly incredible group of people.

Tomorrow is the MRI of my abdomen and pelvis. I’m praying that whatever Dr. M saw on my liver is no longer there. Please think of me tomorrow, Barry and I can use all the prayers we can get.

 

Daily Prompt: 180 degrees

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Tell us about a time you did a 180 — changed your views on something, reversed a decision, or acted in a way you ordinarily don’t.

Right after my divorce, while on the job,  I was introduced to a guy by a friend and we started to date. I was never one to judge a book by it’s cover and to start off this guy appeared to be nice enough.

We dated a few months when I realized he was becoming a bit possessive and discussing our personal business with other employees that were totally inappropriate. I was taking the brunt of all the jokes and did not understand why.

It was approximately 2 days later;  when one employee shared the entire story with me. Later that afternoon, the nonsense started. My pager was going off 50+ times a minute and I actually caught him following me around town.

I turned the pager off and headed to my supervisor’s office. We had a discussion about the trouble I was having. I left my pager with her and went home. The next day, I received a call requesting my presence at a meeting.

When I got to the office, I was met in the conference room by his supervisor, my supervisor, the guy I had been dating and 2 lawyers.. I truly wasn’t sure what to expect.

I was informed that my ex-boyfriend would no longer be a problem, if he valued his job and they wanted to know what my intentions were. Other than being left alone to lead my life, I really did not want anything.

They sounded thrilled, asked me to sign some paperwork and I left. It wasn’t until later that it occurred to me that they were concerned that I was going to sue for sexual harassment. I hate to admit it, it never crossed my mind. I just wanted my privacy.

Not long after this meeting, I decided to make a change in careers. I did a 180 and got away from the nursing end of medicine for a while and went to work for a well known health insurance company.

I continued to have a few issues with my former boyfriend. When I actually caught him and could talk to him, I threatened calling his job. He left quickly and eventually left me alone.

I was enjoying the job I had for the longest time I held a lot of anger toward my ex-boyfriend and my employer. I learned to put everything behind me and get on with my life. I didn’t do anything wrong and I felt forced out of my job, because of the situation. It felt incredible to be able to jump right back into the workplace after basically being stalked.

I did a 180 in my career and didn’t act like I normally do in a relationship. My career would not be where it is today, if I had not made these changes. I thank the Lord for leading me in the right direction. I may have never met Barry, if all of this mess had not happened. Who knows?

Daily Prompt: VIP

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Who’s the most important person in your life — and how would your day-to-day existence be different without them?

Barry, my husband, is the most important person in my life. Unfortunately, at age 47, I have found myself in need of a caregiver.

Barry, not only has the role of the love of my life, but he is legally considered my caregiver. It kills me that my body has done this so early in our marriage, but you deal with what life hands you and take things one day at a time.

The good Lord has his plan for each of us, it is not our place to argue the plan. As a previous teacher I had would say; “you know a plan exists, whether you know the content or not, you work, girl, work it!”

Barry is my helping hand in many daily activities and my own personal engineer. I hold Barry to get out of the tub, but I can get in. He has made sure I have all the proper rails and no-slip gadgets I need around the house.

He treats me like a normal human being. He doesn’t treat me like a baby. I love my mother, but she thinks I’m 10 years old when she helps with anything. I’m glad she is here, because I don’t like being home alone.

I fell once in the garage, while home alone, I just happened to be on the phone when it happened. Help was as phone call away. Thank the Good Lord above. I fell into a box of framed pictures, shattered glass and broken frames all around. Terrified, I froze until help arrived.

To be honest with you, I cannot imagine life without Barry. You know, I can’t even get a bra on straight without him. Trust me, I’ve tried, you can find yourself in some serious pickles, trying that alone with one hand. Wheewww…..I could tell you some stories. I refuse to start wearing those pull-on things. They are too hot.

Without Barry, I would need someone to do any driving further than 20 miles away. Yes, mom lives with me, but I refuse to get in a car with her driving. My heart can’t take it.

I’d need someone to manage the yard work, pay the bills, go to the grocery store and make sure I take my medication correctly. There are days, that my brain tumor rules, and it is close to impossible to even get out of bed. On those days, I’d need someone to cook, make sure I eat and clean up.

I cannot do laundry any longer, so that is another thing I’d need help with. Someone would have to walk and feed the dog as well. I can’t leave the fish out, but I believe I could manage the fish food and watering the plants.

In December of 2011, Barry had a massive stroke and I almost lost him. The doctors actually tried to prepare me for the fact he would not make it through the night. Losing him, I think would have killed me. I hate to sound selfish, but God wasn’t finished with him yet. He knew we needed each other.

To date, other than a few deficits, Barry whipped that stroke in the butt and is back to helping me whip this brain tumors butt. We work together, to make sure everything gets done; with mom quietly tagging along. We all take care of each other and it works.

To answer this prompt, I know everything Barry does for me daily and I do not want to even think about my day-to-day existence without him.

Life would be hard and I’d have to let too many strangers into very personal parts of my life.

Yes, mom could help more, but she isn’t as strong as she used to be and I do not want to be the cause of her getting hurt.

Bear bear says, Yeah!

Bear bear says, Yeah!

Six Word Friday: Move

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Move over winter, spring comes quickly;

Fresh buds moving old foliage aside;

Allowing the new to move in;

Taking it’s time, waiting for spring;

Moving foliage slowly toward the sun;

Warm days move into cool nights;

One season moves aside for another.

Beauty Berry Bush

Beauty Berry Bush

To participate, click the link below:

http://mymemoryart.blogspot.com/2013/02/six-word-fridays-hand.html

Sandy's Azaleas

Sandy’s Azaleas

Time for Myself

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For the first time in ages, I have time for myself.

I’ve loaded the dishwasher, washed two loads of clothes, fed the fish, fed the dog, made lunch, supper is in the crock pot, and I actually made my bed.

All I have left to do is exercise. I don’t start that till 2pm. I was going to hit the gym, but it is crazy windy and bitter cold outdoors. Maggie is refusing to go outside. I do not walk well in the wind and sitting at the fireplace sounds like a better option to me.

Maybe I’ll get Epic Mickey out.  That will kill some time.  Video games usually make me sleepy.  I should probably get more laundry going, too. It’s been raining so much, we’ve been afraid to over load the septic tank. I am behind with the laundry. 

Daily Prompt: All grown Up

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When was the first time you really felt like a grown up (if ever)?

I knew I was a grown-up the day I ordered my first pair of eye glasses, without my parents health insurance. I had my insurance when it paid about 30% of what my dad’s had paid.  I was in sticker shock.

Also, I got a little angry with my mother. The day I ordered those glasses, is the day I found out they had made thin eyeglass lenses for years. My mother had made me suffer through heavy eyeglasses my entire life, when we had insurance that would have paid for a lighter lenses. 

I was the object of incessant ridicule all through school, called ”four-eyes”, and many other ugly names because of my thick eyeglasses. But I guess I can say, that all the jokes toughened me up and I handle tough situations better because of the ‘ragging’ I tolerated as a child.

Mom would always tell me, it’s just words. She was right, words are just words. They can hurt in a big way! I survived. From what I hear, kids are as mean today, if not meaner, than ever in school.

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Knee Business! Happy Dance!!!!! woooohooo……

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I love seeing a doctor and leaving with a smile on my face. With my fall, I  did not cause any permanent damage, because there isn’t any cartilage there to tear.

She has an idea to try before talking about major surgery, so we’ll give that a shot and talk new knee when we have to. I’m game. I’ll rather get an injection under the patella, than go under the knife.

Again, the good Lord has watched over me and showed me flipping out about this is not always the answer. My Faith gets stronger daily. It is really hard not to stress over your health, when you have so many things to stress over. Barry and I are learning to let God take the lead on health issues. The better we get at it, we are honestly feeling less stress over things.

It has gotten to the point that I actually leave my cane or walker in the car, because I don’t want to feel like a little old woman or have anyone laughing at me. Pure silliness. I’m learning to leave my pride in the car, not my walker.

I just got a new walker. Barry says he’ll pimp it out for me if I want him to. A few things might be cute, but I wouldn’t want him to go overboard. The kids will love it! 

I got permission to get my exercise program going again. I’m hoping to start in the morning. I’ve missed the gym.

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Our 200th post, There is a link to the page, but I also put the post below to avoid confusion

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 Click the link for our 200th post:

https://gegebearbear.wordpress.com/200th-post-can-you-believe-it/

The 200th post is below, but I’m gonna leave the page up too. I have removed any mention of a certain person who shall remain nameless. Enough said.

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We thought this post required something special. I find it difficult to believe we’ve been blogging since September 8, 2012! We have been on a journey since that date, but we are holding on strong and closer than ever.

This blog wasn’t our idea, but we have thoroughly enjoyed compiling information for post together. It truly has been therapeutic for both of us. Who would have thought that a counselor, specializing in neurological issues, would know what they were talking about? Maybe that was what we were paying them for? At least our insurance was…..

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We have done so well. Blogging has brought new friends into our lives and seen a few leave. The good seeds continue to take root as the friendships flourish. Others are like annual flowers, they are incredible at first then the heat of the sun fades their colors. Then you pull the annuals and throw them out to put new color in your garden. It is a shame all flowers and friendships cannot be timeless.  Enough said on the matter.

Barry and I continue to enjoy each blogger we have met on WordPress and stay sorrowful over those that did not work out. We have met some incredible people, who have taught us both a lot. Papazilla actually got me to debate a topic in writing, which is something I avoid like. I do not speak well, so there are certain things I do not freely take part in.

I have a rare genetic disorder. I felt so alone dealing with my illness at times, then my friends and family remind me I am not alone. The internet is an amazing tool to use to connect with people you may not meet normally. Barry is wonderful and my best choice to discuss my disease with. Thanks to everyone for being wonderful!

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BrainTumorThursday on Twitter has become a weekly part of my life. When I can take part, I do. When I can’t, I make sure one of my posts, about a brain tumor issue, is on the page. There is such a huge need for funding for research. Brain Tumors kill too many people yearly. I’m including a link to a national foundation for when you would like more information.

Twitter link:

http://paper.li/TumorWarrior/1343039984

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http://www.abta.org/about-us/

http://www.sbtf.org/home.html

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Two groups of hardworking people working to stop the pain of brain tumors. Please check them out. Barry and I take part regularly in the SBTF run/walk to raise money in Atlanta. We enjoy the get together. We also take part in a monthly support group for brain tumor patients. Very helpful group, when figuring life out after a brain tumor.

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http://www.emoryhealthcare.org

I’m including the website for the support group below, check them out. Very enjoyable group.

http://www.neurosurgery.emory.edu/BTSG/index.htm

Tons of extremely hardworking people, check them out!

Check out #BrainTumorThursday on Twitter. Just do a search. Do not forget the hash tag.

teddybearline

Other health issues in constant need of funding are mini-strokes and strokes. As a nurse, I know what to look for and what they look like when occurring. Many people have health issues happen today and are clueless. They have no idea what is happening or whether to consider it an emergency or not. It is truly sad in my eyes that we are not more educated about our bodies and how we should respond to them when they scream at you,

 ‘HEY, I NEED ATTENTION!’

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I’m so glad I was home with Barry when his stroke occurred. He’s an extremely healthy, highly intelligent man. He did not have a clue or remember anything past us getting out of bed that morning. If he had been home alone, he would not be with us at the moment. God is good and decided he wasn’t finished with Barry. He helped me get the right people on to Barry, then the doctors and hospitals took over. New technology saved Barry’s life. Emory University Hospital had Barry in the procedure room before I made it to the hospital. I thank the Good Lord above for guiding the doctors in the proper care Barry needed. Although, his stroke continued once the clot was out of the picture, Barry is alive and thriving.

teddybearline

http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/#mainContent

http://www.strokeassociation.org/STROKEORG/

http://www.stroke.org/site/PageNavigator/HOME

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Since starting our blog, our lives are finally calming down. My illness is settling into a routine of check-ups and Barry is getting stronger each day. Mom is even settling into our routine(Surprise, surprise)

Barry and I are about to embark on a new voyage in our lives. When he retires, we will have time to run around and do what we want. Travel; be lazy;  work in the yard; go to church; visit family; who knows, maybe we will see a movie at the theater…..I have a huge list of ideas, I just have to talk Barry into it. Barry will have a tough time adjusting to staying home. He has driven downtown(Atlanta) to work for over 30 years, sleeping past 6am is already a challenge for him on the weekends. After 9 years of marriage, I can say one thing about Barry L. Baynes. The sweet man despises change!

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If you do not know CPR, LEARN IT! You may need it some day!

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