Tag Archives: Love

That dreadful place called the hospital, It was so hard to leave him there

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Sitting here, in no way can this place  be called fun. I am beginning to understand why people do not like hospitals. Yes, they are places where the sick or injured come to be healed. Hospitals are meant to be full of joy at the birth of a child,  or extremely sad watching a loved one in pain.

Painful things happen in hospitals. A lot of people do not how what or how their bodies work making things painful and scary. Some people experience trauma or have bad memories or cannot handle the emotions that hospitals bring out in you. Others just do not like pain.

The one I am sitting with loves being at home, in his recliner, his wife in her chair next to him and the dog sitting at his feet. Water glass next to him on the table, watching a crazy comedy on the television. He has his cute little quirky sense of humor. I never know what to expect out of his mouth. He even talks for the dog! It is so funny! She just turns her head side to side looking at him like he is nuts.

 

They want me to place him in a long-term care hospital. I do not feel that is where he needs to be, but I’m not a doctor. In my opinion, that will only make him worse. He needs some rehab. I can see a rehab center.

In the two days I have been with him, he has perked up.  Getting in and out of bed on his own (even when the staff did not want him too) He’s getting adventurous, I just hope he does not hurt himself. I love him so much it hurts. The thought of being without Barry, well, it kills me. We aren’t at the age that this kind of thing is expected. I just feel so very lost.

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Absolute Worst Two Weeks Of My Life

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The past five years were the beginning of our on-going nightmare. It has been one serious medical issue after another.

Two weeks ago, Barry was hooking the computer to the television for us to stream the evening service. Barry suddenly starts to fall straight backwards. I called out to him several times, without response. Barry takes a blood thinner, so he truly did not need a lump on his head.

When his head hit the wooden ledge on the front door, he started convulsing. He ended up on his right side, I checked him for injuries, covered him up with a blanket and got a pillow. After around three minutes, he started coming around. He was quite confused and wanting to know what happened. By this time, I had gotten mom and 911 had been called. They were incredibly slow. Apparently, the county EMS was hopping all night.

Once in the Emergency Room, they got things going. There was something going on with his heart. He had a strange arrhythmia that the hospital felt needed more attention, so he was admitted.

The next night, there was another episode opting a move to the ICU for better observation. I found out about the transfer when Barry called the next morning to say he was being trasferred to Saint Joseph’s Hospital within the next hour.

I got ready and headed to Atlanta, as quickly as I could. My sweetheart does not like hospitals and I knew he would not want to be alone. I stayed with Barry for two nights.

Then I had a chemo treatment and on Saturday, the injection to boost my white blood cells. The day of my chemo treatment, they discovered a blood clot under my right arm. I started the injections they ordered before chemo. The next day my right arm was acting up, so I requested to see the infusion center fellow doctor. Since starting the injections, shortness of breath occurred everytime I preformed a task or stood up to walk. I was concerned the clot had moved to my lung.

I was sent straight to the Emergency Room for evaluation. We chose to go to the hospital Barry was in. He was already downstairs having a pacemaker put in. Due to my injection, I was unable to see Barry before the procedure.

Our wonderful pastor made it just in time. Barry was thrilled to see him coming. While I was being evaluated, my sister went to check on Barry and let him know what was going on. He was worried. I tried to convince him I was fine, but do men ever really hear what their wives say?

I was released with a diagnosis of pneumonia. More drugs to take. Gotta love it! Kristie and I almost ran to his room. Kristie needed to get on the road soon. Not only does she have a husband and two boys, she had taken the role of chief caregiver to our father. Barry wanted me to stay, but I was running a fever. He had more test scheduled for the next day, he’d never know I was there or not.

We headed home and packed a bag. I was ready for the next day. My nephew was picking me up to drop me at the hospital for a few days. I wore a mask when I had the fever, and removed it when I did not. We met Barry’s surgeon that morning. They were scheduling his surgery for morning. During the night, I recieved a call that my father had passed away. After surgery, I would not be able to see him. He would be moved to CVICU and I would not be able to see him freely. His doctor told me to go home and come back when he is stable.

Barry had an abcess in his heart and the wall of his heart was erroding. They had to re-build a section of the heart to be able to get a valve in and they were unable to use the mechanical valve. A pig valve was placed. He has been in ICU for over 6 days and today, they finally got him off the venilator. He was up in a chair last time I spoke to the nurse. Such a huge improvement since last week. I was terrified of loosing him. I lost my father.

My blog post my be scattered, but I will get back to normal soon. Missed you all!

Jill

Daily Prompt: Pat on the Back

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Tell someone you’re proud of just how proud you are.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us SUCCESS.

Our nephew, Jonathan, has overcome tons of odds to get where he is today. He has trouble with attention at times and has faught tooth and nail to keep his schoolwork up. He can be a bit lazy, but has made the grade every year and becomes more focused daily.

He loves the outdoors and working outside. His favorite pasttime is torturing his little brother. He has matured so much in the past year. He is turning into quite a nice young man.

He is so handsome at fifteen years old. The good thing is, he hasn’t discovered girls yet. I cannot believe they aren’t beating the door down. Hopefully he will not notice girls until he is in college.

He shows me such respect and is the only person around, other than Barry that doesn’t treat me like I’m a different person since the brain surgery. I’m still Aunt Jill to him. That rewards him the greatest respect from me. To have him show me that kind of respect at his age amazes me.

I cannot believe he is such a sweetheart. I beam with pride as I watch him grow into such a good young man. I’d love to think I might have had a small influence on him. It is an honor to call him my nephew. Who knows?

In memory of Ms. Eva Frady Baynes Roper

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Barry and I were dating, marriage had not been thought about yet, when he got the news that his mother was sick and his step’father neefed our help. It was the first time his stepfather had ever called with any issue concerning his mother.

He had been taking her to a doctor, home health had been ordered and the things they needed him to do at home, he was unable to accomplish. He was asking for help, unsure of what to do himself. Barry and I made a few phone calls and scheduled a few doctors appointments, then headed to Calhoun to check her health status out for ourselves.

One toe on her left foot had turned totally black. The orders the home health agency had was to soak the foot two times daily and apply an ointment and dressing to the toe. The physician had started her on medications for the problem.

Two days later, Barry and I took the two of them to the doctor ourselves and talked to the doctors ourselves. Her diabetes was out of control and she was about to lose that toe. He tweaked her medications a little and sent us home.

The next day, the home health nurse called my cell phone looking for Barry. She felt her health status had changed drastically and was calling an ambulance to send her to the hospital. I immediately called Barry and we headed to Calhoun.

Her kidney doctor did a test that let us know her kidney’s were failing and it would not be long.

While in the hospital, I was talking to his mom and told her that she had to get better. She asked why? I told her that son of her’s was eventually going to ask me to marry him and she would have a wedding to attend. I had to lean in to hear her, but she said, “Do not worry, I’ll be there”! At our wedding, Barry sat two chairs off to themselves for his parents. It was so sweet!

We spent the next three nights sharing a cot by his mother’s hospital bed. We decided to head home to shower and change clothes. Home was a two hour ride. Of course, the minute we walked in the door, the phone was ringing. She had passed away a few minutes prior to the call.

We let James know, we would be back early in the morning, showered and headed to bed. We were exhausted. We had plans to make.

The next day, we called to see about checking Frank out of school to get to the funeral. He took the news hard. His mother was unable to pick him up, but my dad was kind enough to drive me down to pick him up. It was a two day trip, we stayed the night in a hotel and headed back to Calhoun the next morning. Frank’s school was on the Georgia coast and Calhoun almost in Tennessee.

The funeral viewing had begun when we arrived. I have to admit I was a little angry with Barry’s ex-wife when we arrived. She could not make the trip to pick her son up for the funeral, but she could rent a hotel room and head to his mother’s house to start picking out what she wanted and driving poor Barry into a nervous frenzy. My aging father took the time to help me accomplish that task and she never said as much as a “thank you”.

I calmed Barry and got serious about circulating. Ignoring the cause os his nerve overload. Ms. Eva had a wonderful turnout. The mortician had done a beautiful job. The church service was well-done. Frank’s tearful memories were my undoing.

At the graveside service, the flowers were beautiful. As everyone was leaving the service to head back for lunch at the church. Barry, Frank, and I stayed back to take a few photos and take time for our good-byes.

Just as I said, “Ms. Eva, don’t worry, I’ll take care of your boys!” At that very moment, a rose fell off the casket in front of Barry and Frank and landed at their feet. We all froze and looked at one another. We still have those roses in a bible today!

My Sisters, Wonder Woman in disguise…..Bet you never knew there were three

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I am the middle child of three girls. We grew up in a small-town called Winder, Georgia, in the late seventies into the eighties. We are quite a mix, but we make it work. We all have excessively busy lives. We live within 30 minutes of each other and hardly ever see one another.

I’ll start with the oldest, Sandy, Wonder Women number one. She is hardworking, smart,detail oriented, sweet, loving, caring, kind-hearted, meticulous, adores her children and grandchidren, keeps an emmaculate home, takes incredible care of her husband, whom is wheelchair-bound from a spinal cord tumor. Dennis gets around and takes care of himdelf during the day, he even drives. He manages several household chores and always makes sure Sandy has a hot meal ready at night. She is the secretary at her church and drives a school bus for the county they live in.

She likes things done her way or no way; she doesn’t care to see things go wrong; she believes it is ok to plan gatherings the day before she wants to have it; she tells you what time something will start or what time she will arrive, but is always on average two hours late; but on the other hand. She has my love and respect, but I have to admit, I do not know how she does it. I would have packedup and run away a long time ago. She is one tired, incredible woman and I love her dearly. 

Our relationship has changed since I got sick. I miss the relationship Sandy and I had. We will probably never get it back. I had enough trouble accepting the “new me”, how can I expect others to understand and accept the changes I deal with daily. I just want to be included. If I am able, I’ll be there!

Brain injuries make a person vulnerable to infections and other things that could be deadly. That fact has kept me closer to home in the past few years. I’m a great aunt, now. I’d love to be able to play and have fun with them, just as I did her kids growing up. We had some great times.

Enough of that. Let’s get to Wonder Women number two, my younger sister, Kristie. Kristie is sweet, kind-hearted, loving, caring, smart, adores her dhildren and husband, focused, detail-oriented, hard-working, and is currently using her super powers to take care of father, who is gravely ill. Sandy snd I have helped when we could, but it hasn’t been close to enough to give her a break.

Kristie surprised me after I had brain surgery, she visited daily for a few weeks and cooked several meals, so we wouldn’t have to worry about it. She helped get me to rehab when Barry had a conflict. This was so sweet. Not that she hasn’t been sweet in the past,  Barry and I just were not expecting it. Thank you, Kris!

Kristie has a quick temper and let you know when she thinks you are wrong. I did not witness this, but she took a 6’6″ man to the ground and beat him up. Mom called her a “lightening bolt” when getting her up for school in our younger days. She still carries a bolt in her back pocket.

I love both my sisters with all my heart and will do anything in the world for both of them. Thank you both for being there when I have needed you! I could not have gotten better sisters if I had ordered them from a catalog. God truly blessed me in the sister department! Thank you, Dear Lord for my sisters!

Am I ready?

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Such a simple question for process about to begin. God is watching over me, Barry will be by my side, Emory Winship Hospital will be providing the care and mom will be home waiting to cook a nice healthy meal. I’m hoping my stomach will let me eat. I do not need to worry about daddy, because Kristie is in control. I feel sorry for the nurse assigned to Pop yesterday.

My clothes are laid out and ready to go. My tablet will be charged, allowing me access to books, games, the Bible and whatever else the internet may provide as entertainment while waiting for the infusion to complete. I can do more research on chemotherapy and the type cancer I have. I can write a step by step post on what chemo is like. I would not want to bore you to death.

I have to repeat this process every three weeks for four doses. Then we swich to radiation. Radiation is scheduled to be daily for a certain period of time. I’ll find that out when the time comes.

My cousin has given the inside track on whst to ask for from the goof doctors.  She let me know what worked for her and what she has heard from other people. I believe Barry and I are as ready as we can be. 

There is a thunderstorm brewing here. We can hardly keep up with the grass. We’ve had so much rain, the flowers are h8rgeous and yhe grass is growing like crazy. I’m going to hit the sack. Hope everyone has a beautiful day tomorrow!

Lunch at Applebees: A New Barry Moment

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Barry and I had lunch at the local Applebees. I guess we eat there too often, they know us by name and remember our usuals.

We tried out there new summer menu, but we stayed on the lighter side. Gave me a few ideas to try at home. We’ll see.

The waitress brought our check out. Barry gave her what was needed to handle the bill. As he gave it to her for processing, he said, “If that card doesn’t work, I have a doctor’s excuse that allows me to wash dishes.”

When she returned after processing the payment, she stated, “You can do dishes if you want, but the card went through.”

I quickly told her, “I do not know him, he offered me lunch and I said sure.”

She said, “Hey, you got a free lunch” and sped off back to work.

Barry can be such a clown. I love him for trying to lighten my mood. We have a huge day ahead of us and he knows I stressing a little. He is just a sweetheart.

Personal Prayer Request

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I believe in the power of prayer. I have seen too many things in my lifetime that proves there is. On this date, I am asking that everyone pray for my father, Lee Van Hayes. He received some extremely bad news from his doctor today. I think we were all expecting it, even dad, but hearing those words are not easy. WordPress Blogs are full of love and kindness, with a few freaky things added in. I’d love it if I could take my computer to Pop and show him all the well wishes received from my fellow bloggers.

WordPress reaches tons of people. It would be such a wondrous thing to get at least half the people, in our blogosphere, saying a little prayer for one special man. I know he is not special to everyone, but he is to my family and his friends. My dad doesn’t meet strangers, he likes everyone. He is just the biggest sweetheart on earth! My family, as well as Barry and I would greatly appreciate any small wish of good health or just a hope you are feeling better soon.

We are to the point that prayer is the answer. Dad is in God‘s hands and he will take care of him. Thank you in advance for anything you say!

If my comments section is not working yet, please use the email available for my blog: geegeebear3@gmail.com.

Have a bless day!

Barry and Jill

and the family of LeeVan Hayes

English: The logo of the blogging software Wor...

English: The logo of the blogging software WordPress. Deutsch: WordPress Logo 中文: WordPress Logo (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

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